Archive for March, 2009


the rules around here

So, to recap: when it’s the UAW employees’ contract, concessions and givebacks are necessary to keep the thing running. In contrast, when it’s AIG execs’ contracts, we’re suddenly “a nation of laws” and negating their seven-digit bonuses sets “a dangerous precedent”.

Unfortunately, the populist approach, however good it may feel, gets us nowhere. The bonuses make up a tiny percentage of the total TARP and bailout money. Combine that with the fact that you and I are now AIG stockholders, it’s in our interest to make sure the only folks who can undo this mess are incentivized to do so. 

The thing I can’t get out of my head, though, is justifying exec pay with the “that’s the only way we can attract the top talent” line. That’s just tired. In fact, here’s an offer, corporate America: I’d be happy to run your company into the ground at half the price your current CEO, COO, or CFO is charging. When it comes to breaking stuff, I’m talented as shit. Any takers?


in some cultures, it is considered a great compliment to draw a moustache on a lady as she sleeps

I feel bad about not having posted of late. Judging from my traffic statistics, though, my negligence has been a victimless crime. I wish I could say the lack of posting has been due to a particularly fruitful period of work on ye olde novel, but truthfully I just haven’t had any ideas appropriate for the short form lately (though I did recently write a tremendously satisfying note on facebook about my ten favorite albums).  To absolve myself, dear reader, here’s an excerpt from the novel:


Pretty meager offering, I know, but due to my famously stringent self-editing process, it’s the only thing that I’ve committed to in the drafts thus far. More soon, I promise.  I do need to take a break from thinking about the big project.