03
Jul
09

if i don’t survive, take this key, go into my house, and destroy all my scorpions cassettes

edited 7/5/09. i can’t be publishing no posts with less than 100 words, mang.

Scattershooting while wondering whatever happened to Squeaky Fromme:

1.”For if we’re honest with ourselves, we’ll acknowledge that there are good and decent people in this country who don’t yet fully embrace their gay brothers and sisters — not yet.” -Pres. Obama, June 29

Enough already with the coddling of America’s jerkfaces. At this point in the debate, there are two types of people who are opposed to marriage equality:

        a. people who are 100 years old.

        b. fucking idiots.

These groups share something else in common: they should be given low priority on the organ transplant list.

2. During her resignation speech, did anyone else think we were this close to hearing Sarah Palin actually say the words “the Iraq, and such as”?

3. Dear 101.5FM,

Now that we’re officially halfway through the year 2009, it’s probably okay to maybe not play a Sublime tune every half-hour. I’m sure that if any of Bradley Nowell’s surviving relatives live in Austin, they will understand.  

4. Every time news breaks of an elected official’s illicit affair, the analysis always seems to include some explanation that risk-taking, narcissistic behavior comes from the same personality trait that drives clintonedwardsspitzerensignsanford to success in their chosen field. I don’t buy this, if only because it does little to explain the fact that I routinely engage in self-destructive habits, and I’ve never succeeded at anything.

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3 Responses to “if i don’t survive, take this key, go into my house, and destroy all my scorpions cassettes”


  1. 1 Sarita
    July 6, 2009 at 10:28 am

    Isn’t pop radio illegal in our fine capital anyway?

    p.s. try this http://www.americanshortfiction.org/

  2. 2 jimjbollocks
    July 6, 2009 at 1:43 pm

    Modern rock is the agreed-upon compromise choice on the dial for my workplace. Not perfect, but a significant step up from the reggaeton station favored by my last place of employment.

  3. July 19, 2009 at 11:05 pm

    Hmm. Just checked back in. Still…. pretty much making me snicker out loud.


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