Archive for December 11th, 2013


the greatest trick god ever pulled was inventing the platypus to fool the world into thinking He had a sense of humor

How familiar is Mick Jagger with the catalogs of lesser classic rock artists? Back in the 1970s, did he feel any need to keep up with anyone other than his direct competitors in the Bowie/Who/former-Beatle stratosphere? When his assistant would deliver Mick’s weekly slew of swag (back before we had a word for swag), was a freshly pressed vinyl copy of Foghat’s “Fool for the City” in the basket, nestled somewhere between a pair of trousers custom tailored by a then-unknown Gianni Versace and a kilo of complimentary cocaine? Did he get introduced at parties to Mark Farner, then have to nod courteously and pretend to know who Grand Funk Railroad was? How many hits did ZZ Top have to record before Mick found it necessary to dig deep into their discography to discover an altogether different track called “Brown Sugar,” one less overtly racist and sexist- but no less jammin’- than the Stones’ 1971 classic? Has Mick Jagger ever sat in a Camaro? Drank beer straight out of the can? Thousands of nights Mick Jagger has spent in hotel rooms- surely there exists some infinitesimal percentage of those nights he has spent flipping through the cable channels: has he ever seen a rerun of WKRP? Did he find Dr. Johnny Fever cool or a little bit pathetic? “I think Howard Hesseman intends him to be both, actually,” Mick says to Mark Farner at a party. “Say, have you met Dr. Joyce Brothers? I think you’d get on smashingly. Now let me leave you two alone so you can get to know each other.”

December 2013
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